To all my single friends, your WhatsApp statuses and Facebook are probably stocked with your friends ‘baes’ and various gifts that they have been showered with. Don’t let lack of a significant partner make you dread this day. So today, I want to talk about self-love. Self-love is the most important form of relationship in your life. It is genuinely accepting yourself which in return creates a strong bond in your other relationships. It is about looking after your body, mind and spirit. You’ve probably heard of “love your neighbor as you love yourself”. So, treat yourself today. Get yourself a bouquet of roses and chocolates. There’s nothing wrong with being single as you wait for what you truly deserve. Being in a relationship is not a measure of worth neither is it an achievement. You deserve to give yourself all the love so don’t be afraid to spoil yourself and shower yourself with compliments.
Self-love is about:
Self-love is the willingness to accept who you are; both the good and the bad side. It is giving yourself as much as you are willing to give to others. It provides you with inner peace and happiness that can be affected by the opinion of others. It helps you make healthier choices and decisions across all relationships in your life. Self-love lets you celebrate others and appreciate their achievements rather than being jealous.
Self-love lets you celebrate others and appreciate their achievements rather than being jealous.
Knowing your value and adhere to it
Knowing your value and self-worth means you don’t see it as a privilege when you interact with people of higher status than you are. We self-sabotage ourselves in relationships and work places because we don’t ask for what we deserve. We feel that we are lucky to work at a certain organization or have some people in our lives. Demand to be recognized be it in work places or in romantic relationships.
Teaching others how to treat you
If you find yourself unhappy on how people are treating you, it’s time to have a meeting with yourself and do a self-check. I have learnt that we attract who and what we are. People treat us the way we let them. If people insult you, take you for granted, use you or even abuse you it’s because you let them do it. You comfortably let it slide without confronting them about their actions. Maybe because you thought they were too important and you’d lose them if you questioned their behavior. Truth is, no one is more important than yourself. Let them treat you they way you deserve otherwise show them the door.
No one in the entire universe deserves your love more than you do. Self-love is the perquisite of all form of love in your life. You can never experience true love without genuinely loving yourself first. Let go of anything that makes you believe that self-love is selfish and egocentric. Loving yourself is a win-win. It is accompanied by unmeasurable happiness and joy that no else can offer you but God. So, if nobody treated you this valentines don’t wallow in self-pity. Wake up and treat yourself to a nice meal, a movie or even do a note to self.
There’s nothing wrong with being single as you wait for what you truly deserve. Being in a relationship is not a measure of worth neither is it an achievement. You deserve to give yourself all the love so don’t be afraid to spoil yourself and shower yourself with compliments
For those in relationships, don’t get into the whirlwind of valentine’s day and forget about yourselves. Self-love is the greatest love of all. Romantic love may come and go but self-love lasts a lifetime.
Shalom Musyoka, Cohort 8.